There were days I made them laugh. There were days I could barely get a snigger. I was the star or I was the dark space between. Was it the shirt I wore? Was it my haircut? Was it my delivery? My desperation?
Like Katie Perry’s Hot N Cold, I couldn’t find my place in the world. Or, I would find it only to loose it later. Eric Clapton’s It’s in the way that you use it always struck a chord with me for this reason.
“I must just be using it wrong,” I thought.
And I was
I was using my humor, my intellect, my talents to win the praise and adulation of the world. But the world is a sea of change, full of moody people, fickle, awkward, insecure, and I am one of them.
If only there were someone I might serve. If only there was a love which might free me from the need to search it out. If only there was love which could give me life and life in abundance, than I might spread it abroad. Than I might put away the magic arts and take up the craft of service, of peace, of love.